So for Girl's Night Out this last weekend the seven of us + Grandma Carter +Aunt Renee + Cambria + Liz + Aunt Paula + Abby + some interloping men (Grandpa, Uncle Mitch, Matt, Baby Ben) went to support Emily in the Utah's Junior Miss Pageant! We went on the final night and Emily was in the talent portion of the program. I was so thrilled to see how great she did! She looked so elegant and sophisticated and when she played her piece on the piano she rocked the house! I was so impressed. That was the best moment of the evening!However after the 45 minute "Entertainment Portion" provided by last years winners I think I reached my fill of pageant attending until the next time a cousin is in one! (this is my third family related pageant). Don't get me wrong the winner from last year was also the winner at the American Junior Miss and was talented. I repeat, she was super talented and by golly she was going to drive that point home with a 200 lb sledge hammer or a 45 minute love fest. (I think I would have preferred the quick hit with the sledge hammer)
One thing that I really found true about hanging with the beauty pageant crowd was it makes you very catty! Not like "oh look at the cute kitty" catty but more like wrinkle your nose "Did you see her shoes?" catty. Which is really disturbing because I really know nothing about shoes.
Another odd thing about pageants. They call all the previous contestants "Has Been's" So I come to the second fun part of the evening (the first being Emily, remember?) Well at one point the emcee (Has Been from 2002) asked all the other Has Been's in the audience to please stand up. Well. Apparently. Someone, who shall remain nameless, decided that she was very much a "Has Been" so she stood up. She stood up and waved. For what seemed like a long time. Much to the distress of her much more humble sisters both of whom were beet red!
So I decided that I would do some research to see if this person was truly a "Has Been" It turns out she is! Here are the highlights.
Here we see our contestant in the application stage where she talked about all her charity work that she has been doing with a polygamist sect from Eagle Mountain. She even dressed in their clothes to make them realize that she is just one of the little people. Look at that poor girl on the right. She must be like a 4th wife. The little boy does look a little neglected.
Here she is at that scholastic interview portion of the pageant! Which for those of you who are "Never Been's" happens behind closed doors in apparently a very dark and somewhat frumpy place. Here is our contestant (still nameless) in the evening wear portion of the pageant. Apparently she thought the other contestant had stolen her shoes. Oh wait they had the exact same pair. My mistake. Anyhow I don't know what the other contestant did to get that glare. Your guess is as good as mine but it was probably something catty!
Here she is at the physical fitness portion of the pageant where all the girls do the same routine and try hard not to let the sweat run onto their large white teeth as they grin ceaselessly at the judges. And finally the part that kicked her over the edge. Her talent. Our contestant had the very original talent of the Umbrella Dance. It involved a series of complicated wrist gyrations not to mention the all important opening and closing of the umbrella! All of course was set to music!
I don't know about you but I am relieved that I can call her a "Has Been" without any hesitation as to her worthiness! By the way... did you see her shoes?
6 months ago