He taught me to dance in the kitchen

My sweet Dad passed away peacefully on Wednesday, March 26, 2008. It is so hard to put into words what transpired. We knew he was very sick. We knew the cancer may claim his life someday but despite that knowledge the suddenness in which this happened has left me gasping. I was lucky enough to have spent a nice evening with him on Tuesday. It was just the two of us for a while and we talked about how every day was a gift and I told him I wanted there to be a lot more "every days". On Wednesday morning he spent the morning with Alli helping her get ready for a job interview. Later that morning he stopped talking to Alli which prompted her to call me. I talked to him on the phone and he was able to answer "Yes" to my questions. After talking to Alli for a few minutes we knew that something was amiss and Alli called Mom. Mom came home and the ambulance was called. We came to find out that he was no longer getting enough oxygen and he slipped into unconsciousness. With the help of the paramedics and the nurse we were able to get his oxygen levels up a bit higher but he never regained consciousness.
Through the next few hours amazing miracles transpired. The blessing of having all six of his kids with him at this time would have made my Dad very happy. It was a miracle that we were all able to be there. Most of the grandkids were even able to come give him a final "Rock". His sons blessed him and we knelt and prayed together as a family. I held his hand which had once been so strong and now was so tired. We talked quietly and we were laughing and crying and reminiscing together when he finally gave up the fight. He died very peacefully at 5:30 in the afternoon.
Mom really wanted to do the funeral on Saturday so the next few days were packed full of picking out the casket, writing the obituary, putting together the program, calling many friends and family members, putting together the displays, making the DVD, and practicing songs. Keeping busy postpones the grief until nighttime. Nights are hard. The Comforter was with us so strongly that it was difficult to leave each other. I wish I felt that close to the Spirit all the time.












The viewing and the funeral were so comforting. I was amazed at how many people told me that my dad was their best friend. I learned a lot about him as others would tell me stories. I gained strength from the love and support of others. There was a lot of laughter and joy there for me amidst the sorrow.













This week I have been grateful for so many things.

• My righteous mom is so full of love and of the Spirit and she is my strength and example. Her spirit and faith fills our home and each one of us in turn.
• My husband is my rock and gets me through the hard nights, lonely moments and makes me laugh.
• My brothers are my pillars on whom I can always rely. They are all that is fine and right and true. Dad is proud of each of them.
• My sisters are part of my heart and understand me without explanation.
• My sister-in-laws and future brother-in-law are the bricks of our family. They have been absolutely amazing. They are there for not only their spouses but they are the action behind all the planning and details. They did everything to help make things go smoothly and I am so grateful for them.
• My in-law family are my own personal back-up family. They have helped with phone calls, cards, flowers, baby-sitting and just letting me cry on their shoulders.
• My extended family for their support. Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles and Cousins are the mortar which held us all together. Many travelled long distances to come to the viewing and the funeral. Their hugs and smiles and tears helped us go on. Family is amazing. I love them all.
• My friends have been fantastic. I cried with them the most! Their comfort was not expected which made it that much more powerful. I love them so much and consider myself very lucky to have them in my life.
• The Comforter who is real and powerful.
• My Savior and my Heavenly Father. They live. They love me. They love my dad. Together they have made a plan which makes it possible for me to not only see my dad again but for me to live with him forever. I cannot express the joy that knowledge brings. I find it amazing how my testimony is stronger than ever as we go through this process.

Lastly, I am grateful for Dad. He was a good man. He loved his family. He had a firm testimony. He served his fellow men. He taught me correct principles. He taught me to laugh. He took out my splinters. He listened to me sing and supported me at my concerts. He welcomed my friends into our home. He worked hard to give us nice things and take us fun places then he stressed about traveling! He taught me about knots. He taught me to love our family history. He couldn't stand to teach me to drive a stick shift! He worried more about me than the car after I got in an accident. He was a great support to the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy. He helped wire my house. He danced with me in the kitchen. He was my dad and I will miss him.

Congratulations accepted here!

So lately I have been named by a various assortment of my family (made up of an elect committee of Homework Haters and Piano Practicing Pouters) as the (drum roll please) ..... World's Worst Mother or many of it's other well known titles such as Meanest Mom (MM), Worst Mom Ever (WME) and other honorable titles!
I usually have a great acceptence speech after I win the coveted title! The speech usually includes a sincere "Thank you to the committee" in some form (which seems to anger the committee. Weird.). I really should thank my mother who was also a WWM a few years ago. I learned a lot from her! The speech also includes a "How lucky are you to have me for this role" which sounds a bit uppity to some but really they need to know that receiving this title really is an honor for them as well!
The HH and PPP proceed to tell my how unfortunate all their friends are that "their mothers aren't nearly so mean"! It does make you concerned for all the poor children out there who aren't as lucky as mine!
In conclusion I promise my committee that I will continue to perform to the best of my ability all the duties necessary to make sure I honor the title for as long as necessary and in the case that I am unable to fulfill my duties for some reason (such as a mental collapse) that the Honorable M.D.E. (Meanest Dad Ever) will step us and fulfill my duties!

Spring Break Rollins Style!

Well, we are back!

We had a shaky start as we travelled to Winnemucca and checked into the hotel only to discover that Alex had a horrible fever, swollen glands and a sore throat. I was sure he had strep as it has been going around our neighborhood! What a mess. Lucky for me I had brought some Tylenol so we got him comfortable enough to sleep. Needless to say the first thing we did in California was take him to an Urgent Care! I was shocked to find that though he might have strep his throat woes were nothing compared to his horrible ear infection. Once again showing the medical world that I am indeed the Worlds Worst Mother! Sara and I had spent our time in the waiting room talking about how we need a Dr. in the family if for no other reason than to check for ear infections! Both of us have had the experience of 1) taking the screaming child in and having no infection and 2) taking the child in for a well-child checkup and being told that he/she has a double ear infection! So 10 minutes later I have another "I swear he never even mentioned his ear was hurting" moment! Sometimes I tell you I feel like I need to have my child fill out one of those medical questionnaires before I take him in to the doctor. Do you have a history of ear pain? Does this area hurt? How about this one? I also think I should swear him in before questioning him because he tells me his neck is killing him, which I reported to the doctor but when she asks him he says... Nope it doesn't hurt! It is all a plot to make me look like the WWM! He acutally didn't get better until Saturday night, Sunday morning. Until that point he couldn't walk and if he did he hunched over to the side and kept one hand up by his chest and the other on his head. He looked like a little special child! It was hilarious.
We had the best time with Brad,Sara, Alli and of course Adam, Emma and Ethan! Sara is a brilliant hostess and it is amazing to me that even in the middle of the chaos of remodeling the entire house it is still something you would see in the Pottery Barn catalog! Their house was great before and it will be absolutely amazing when they sell it!

Friday we spent a Very, Very, VERY full day in San Francisco and wore the boys right out! We did Fisherman's Wharf, (complete with clam chowder), the cable car, Chinatown, Ghirardelli Square, the Aquarium and even saw Lombard Street although by this time it was dark!

By far my favorite thing that we did was go to pier 45 and check out the WWII Submarine and the WWII Merchant Vessel. We spent 2 hours touring through those with the boys and talking about what their Great-grandfathers did in the Navy and seeing how they may have lived! It was so cool!






Saturday was Adam's baptism. It was beautiful! There is something to be said for living in a small ward! Adam was the only baptism on that day and all the talks and stories and slides shows were directed right to him. Adam inherited a bit of his fathers fashion sense and was a bit mortified by the white jumper that he was supposed to wear. His desire to be baptized won out and after seeing his own dad in an equally attractive (not to mentioned a bit hiked up on his backside) outfit the baptism program commenced. Alli gave a great talk on baptism and the importance of the gate he was opening that day. Sara had put together a wonderful slide show about Adam and then Brad baptized him. We sang songs as we waited for Brad and Adam to get dressed in their far more stylish outfits and join us again. I then gave a talk on the gift of the Holy Ghost with help from both Josh and Aaron. They told Adam what they have felt like when they fell the Holy Ghost. Then Brad confirmed him. What a glorious day for Brad, Sara, Adam and the rest of the family. We were so glad that we were there. That day alone made the entire trip worth it!

After the after baptism celebration we loaded up everyone this time and went across the Golden Gate bridge (cool) to Muir Woods (awesome). They aren't as big as the giant redwoods (or so I am told) but they fit the bill as far as I was concerned! It was incredible! The world in all it's variety is such a beautiful place. After our hike we took the 1 up the coast a ways to Stinson Beach! The scenery there was breathtaking! I love to see the waves crash up on the rocks and see the ocean stretch out forever. The sun was going down and it was so wonderful. We got out and ran in the FREEZING cold water for a few minutes which was great for some good laughs and many squeals!




Sunday we had a great Easter and thank goodness the Easter Bunny found my boys all the way in Suunyvale! Who knew bunnies were so smart? We went to church and my boys experienced the joy of going to Sara's primary!

We loved the chance to just sit and chat with the family! We love our Rencher cousins and the aunts and uncle that they live with!

I'm Off!

The family Rollins will be taking off to sunny CA to visit Brother Brad and Sister Sara and Adam, Emma and Ethan, and Sister Alli for a few days! Adam is being baptized this weekend and it is sure to be a great time! We plan on taking in a few sites in San Francisco while we are there. The boys have never been and it has been years for Dave and I as well. Should be great if we survive the drive!

For all of you Jane Austen fans out there check out this website! Kind of fun!

Take the Quiz here!